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03 January 2008

Ten ways to tell you are not yet a grownup

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I often lament the fact that I do not yet feel like a true adult. For sometime I've been thinking about writing a column on the subject. Today I was motivated to put pen to paper, so to speak, by Ashe Mischief who has resolved to become a real grownup in 2008. I really admire her resolutions for the New Year, so much so I plan to adopt several myself. On that note, I raise a final toast to my inner is to hoping she grows up a bit this year. Here are ten ways to tell that you might also have not yet reached adulthood:
  1. You never have more than $40 cash in your wallet at any one time, and in fact that number is usually closer to $5. When visiting the ATM you would never take out more than $60 at a time, and that is only because you owe your friend $20 for picking up the tab at lunch at that charming cafe that only took cash.
  2. You don't balance your checkbook. In fact, generally speaking, you just check your balance every few days online to make sure you have about the right amount of money in your account.
  3. Take out. It's what's for dinner.
  4. Breakfast and lunch primarily consist of caffeinated beverages, and perhaps some carbs if you are feeling peckish. More often than not you might forget to eat breakfast all together.
  5. You own four aprons from anthropolgie, which you wear to make Pillsbury slice and bake cookies. Thanks to Clueless you know that the log of dough should be sliced and not just plunked down on the cookie sheet whole.
  6. Your hairdresser lectures you on the importance of regular haircuts during your annual or biannual visit. At this point in your life the only thing that would motivate you to make more regular appointments is the appearance of lots of gray hair.
  7. All free food is good a result you've made a meal of the bell pepper and lettuce garnish with a small bag of Lays potato chips.
  8. Car maintenance, home maintenance, bicycle maintenance...these things tend to happen on an as needed, emergency basis. In fact self maintenance seems to be the on type of maintenance that occurs on a regular basis, even more so when one is dating.
  9. You own sufficient socks and underwear to avoid doing laundry for two months.
  10. At work, in large meetings, you rarely contribute productive commentary. You actually spend the better part of the meeting day dreaming about shoes, your birthday, your blog, Tom Welling...
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a. said...

Yep that's me to a tee except I don't own any aprons ;-)

Ashe said...

Oh! I have another one for you-- you're not a grown-up if the food in your refrigerator has mold growing on it.

This year I vow to clean out my fridge more regularly.

flutterbyblue said...

Lol! I'm actually the opposite when it comes to underwear -- I have just enough to last me a week, when I run out that means it's time to do laundry!

Lys said...

Wowza... here I am thinking I am all grown up and *bam* I have some work to do.

And yes, the science experiments in the back of the fridge can be quite frightening when one forgets that she bought a small pint of raspberries and those grew mold quicker than a wheel of cheese.

Anonymous said...

yeah. i thought i was growing up and being responsible but according to this i'm not at all!

Anonymous said...

After thinking about this list a little, I think the lack of cash thing might just be a generation difference. I think our generation just relies less on cash

Anonymous said...

Wow, with the exception of not owning anything from anthropologie, this is FRIGHTENINGLY dead on. Although I guess I should have known I'm not yet a grownup as I still live in a dorm with a bunch of freshmen. Oh well.

Fun blog; I like it!